“If you are looking for the love of your life, stop. They’ll be waiting for you when you start doing the things you love.” (posted by Mark Anthony Simmons). 

I saw this post on FB and I love that statement because so many people I talk to are trying to set a goal to attract the love of their life or attract that relationship in their life. When I say to them, “That’s not a goal,” it can be a bit confusing.  While that might be the side effect of you reaching a goal, attracting a relationship in your life is not a goal.

Goals are designed to stretch and grow you.  One of the things that I love about that statement is the idea that when you’re really reaching for something that you’d love to be, do, or have andit’s based on your wants and desires, that’s you standing in your truth. And when you are standing in your truth and shining your light, you attract different people into your life, different circumstances.  So just by the sheer nature of you growing, you’re going to attract different people into your life. 

How many of you know people who leave one relationship and then they attract the same type of relationship all over again? It’s almost like they’re dating the same person over and over and over again, right?  It’s because they haven’t changed on the inside. We can never outperform our self-image. That’s why goals are so important. 

When you are setting goals that you’ve set before, there’s no growth attached to that.

And a lot of people set goals like that and I know firsthand because I was one of them.  Look, you might be really busy, but you’re not really moving forward when you do it this way. You’re not changing who you are, not changing the essence of who you are. You’re pretty much saying, “Whoa, I’m busy.”  Consequently you’re moving laterally, so it looks like you’re doing many things, but you’re not really shifting and growing. But when you get plugged in and dialed into something that you’re really passionate about – when you set a goal that’s exciting and scary at the same time, based on your wants and desires, not what you’ve done in the past, then your past mistakes, snafus, successes, well none of that matters.

Conversely, when you’re setting a goal that’s heart-centered and you’re really going for it, then when you reach your goal or when reach that milestone, that’s GROWTH.

It might even seem like when you’re growing in that way, learning about yourself and studying yourself, that you might think, “Gosh, everyone around me seems so nice or they’ve changed.” But the truth is, they haven’t changed.  It’s just the people around you are a mirror reflecting your thoughts and how you’re being and how you’re showing up in the world. You’re changing, and as a result, everyone around you is changing. You start attracting different circumstances to you, different people into your life.

So if you want a relationship, you’ve got to do the work inside. If you’re hopping from one relationship to another, thinking “Oh, that didn’t work, so I’m going to have another one,” and it’s the same one, well it’s frustrating to experience, and it’s because you’re not doing the inner work. You’re not shifting.

When you start living in your truth and standing in your purpose, when you’re clear and connected with what that actually is and when you start growing and going for it, I promise you, you’re going to attract different people. You’ll attract people who are in harmony with this new, wonderful you. You are perfect the way you are, but it’s a matter of you rediscovering that perfection within you. You do that when you start shining your light and start standing in your purpose.

The side effect of you living your best life, loving your life and loving what you’re doing is attracting people that are in harmony with you. And as a result, you may find that relationship. It’ll certainly be a different one than you’ve been attracting in the past.

I hope that my journey inspires you to really go after what you want. If you want some support to really learn how to discover what your purpose is and how do you go about doing that, I would be more than happy to get on a call with you. Message me, and we’ll figure something out and we’ll get you pointed in the right direction. I love sharing this work. I’m just truly passionate about it.  I hope that you are receiving this and it’s making a difference in your life.