Aloha! I was traveling for the entire month of September and during my travels, I was at a PSI seminar, where a question was asked and it’s one that I want to talk about today.
Are you a giver or a taker?
That question really got me to examine how I show up in the world. Obviously, there are givers and we know who we are and who they are. Maybe we even know some givers who are constantly giving, giving, giving and they’re burnt out. Or maybe they are feeling a little resentful because they feel like they’re giving all the time and they’re not receiving anything? Does that sound like you?
What is interesting is the parallel between the idea of giving and taking and energy. Energy always comes back to its source. So when you put positive energy out there, when you’re giving, when you leave somebody with the impression of increase, when you leave somebody better off than when you found them, you know, they might not receive that compliment or that positive energy from you, but that energy will always come back to you in some way, maybe not in that moment. And I realized, in terms of giving and receiving and giving and taking, it really has a big play on the energy that you’re able to receive.
So for example, we know what giving is. We all have an idea of what that looks like. Maybe you give someone a gift or you help somebody out or you give somebody a compliment. And we probably have an idea of what takers are. Takers are people; maybe we use the word selfish when thinking about them. Takers are energy vampires; they take everything that you give. They’re borrowing money and not paying it back. Taking up your time; just taking from you. And when you ask them for help, they’re gone. And I’m sure you have other examples or ideas, or people who come to mind. The big “aha” moment for me was that there are so many people out there, myself included, who will give but then are not open to receiving.
I can think back a snapshot in time when I was in a position where I was giving to people, a leadership role to really take care of other people. There was so much personal turmoil going on in my life and with health issues that I was giving but I felt depleted. I didn’t open myself up to receiving and nobody really knew what was going on with me. Think about yourself and your nature. Do you like to help people? Does it feel good when you’re able to help somebody? Are you good at receiving when somebody wants to hold the door for you or if somebody offers to buy you a coffee? Or do you say, ‘Oh no, I got it.’
I caught myself doing things like that. And the truth is, at that moment, I’m being a taker because I’m not giving that person the opportunity to give and I’m not receiving it graciously. How it plays into energy is energy always comes back to its source. So if you find in your life that you want a lot of things to transpire, your career, your relationships, your wealth, but you’re not getting it, I would examine how you’re receiving. Because how you do one thing, is how you do all things. If you find that you’re not letting people in, then really ask yourself the hard questions.
Somebody asked me ‘do you need help with your luggage?’ And I responded with ‘no, I got it.’ Because my thought was that I didn’t want to burden somebody else. But the truth is that I missed out on a connection, an opportunity to connect and for that person to give and for me to graciously receive. Do you see the parallel there? If you’re not open to receiving and letting someone in, letting someone love you and letting someone connect with you and give, then you’re closing the door to all these other things that you want in your life.
So I invite you to really, really sit down and examine: are you a giver or taker? Only you can answer that.
I just love this work and it has been transformative for me in my personal life and my professional life. Coaching has been a tremendous part of my journey and I attribute that to my success. I continue to be coached and I coach people through their negative energy, their wants and desires and helping them attract more powerful things into their lives.
If this is something that resonates with you, I have a multitude of ways that we could work together. Maybe one on one coaching isn’t for you. I could also point you in the direction of PSI seminars, which is where I just came from. That’s how I sharpen my saw working with Bob Proctor, also at PSI seminars. And I’ll never stop going and growing. If you want to have a deeper conversation about it or talk about what giving and taking look like, then message me and we’ll get on a call.